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reckless intuitions of an epistemic hygienist

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[09 Feb 2020|05:47pm]
Wouldn't you like to read my academic posts instead? Stats Computer Science

insta-chair [06 May 2012|05:32pm]
Dear LJ Genie,

I would love to get one of those portable instant chairs. They aren't full chairs, just a support for your butt when sitting on the ground, made of nylon (or similar material), with the rough shape&size of a laptop, ideal for reading a book while sitting on the grass. I remember seeing them around ~2000, perhaps as one of the products sold by MGMT101 students.

Gustavo

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my iPad apps & reviews (mostly drawing and note-taking) [04 May 2012|03:29pm]
ShowMe: FREE! Perfect for Khan Academy-style lectures.




DropText: $1. For editing plain text documents on the DropBox cloud, a feature that the DropBox app is lacking.


These 2 apps are mainly for annotating pre-existing documents:

iAnnotate PDF: $10. Highlight and draw on PDFs. Annoyance: pencil thickness is zoom-dependent, so every annotation has its own thickness.

GoodReader: $5. Basically a filesystem. It feels like many different apps bundled as one. You can edit text files. You can highlight and draw on PDFs, but the UI is too complicated and tool icons are unpleasantly small. I suspect that there's a way to connect to DropBox, making DropText obsolete, but I haven't figured it out yet.




Notability ($5 $1) and NoteShelf ($6): Very similar apps. They are both (a) paper-like note-taking apps that (b) support typing as well as handwriting, and (c) offer dual zoom view, which is very useful for handwriting more precisely while viewing a bigger area of the "paper", and which comes with a nice line-wrapping feature. (d) Organized into 3 levels: Notability calls them "categories > notes > pages", while NoteShelf calls them "bundles of notebooks > notebooks > pages".

Notability has text search; NoteShelf doesn't. On Notability, you move by using 2 fingers; on NoteShelf, you can use just one finger on the zoomed-out view.

On Notability, each page is associated with an audio recordings (I feature I've never wanted). NoteShelf has a wrist protection feature, which works sometimes.

Notability has a silly use of colors by default (which you can change), while NoteShelf has a very tasteful look.

Noteshelf vs. Remarks vs. Notability: iPad handwriting app shootout!

Apparently Notability can also annotate PDFs via DropBox! Maybe I should move it to the category above.

Notability is lacking a textbox feature, but planning to add it in a future version. This means that typing can be clunky, since all text starts from the left margin.



Skitch: FREE. For annotating maps/pictures. Not very good. No scrolling.



Unlike the above, this one is for artists:

SketchBook Express: FREE. Lots of fun. Transparent layers lets you overlay things. Unfortunately, it doesn't deal properly with the iPad's rotational symmetry, so many saved pictures end up upside down. The Pro version apparently gives you more drawing tools, more layers, etc.



Infinite Sketchpad: $1. A toy. Drawing app with unbounded zoom in both directions.

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armchair neuroscience [21 Apr 2012|02:33pm]
Conjectures: (a) the temporal resolution of human vision is determined by the refractory period of sensory neurons (b) this is the mechanism by which alcohol slows down one's reflexes.

Alex Sweet (1951) p.198:
<< At the fovea, for either the light- or dark-adapted eye, the just noticeable interval of time between two adjacent flashes was approximately 5m.sec >>


i.e. if you're going to have a flickering light, the flicker will tend to be noticeable if the frequency is lower than 200Hz.

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R: semantics and pragmatics / names vs values [21 Apr 2012|11:53am]
One of the annoyances in R is dealing with functions that don't evaluate one or more arguments that you pass, or who otherwise use the name of the variable passed. The problem appears when you try to write abstractly.

e.g. with(data, ZQ/Total.Z) will compute data$ZQ / data$Total.Z . What 'with' is doing is parsing that expression, figuring out which variable tokens are already present in the current environment, and putting "data$" in the front of the rest. Yesterday, in my naivety, I implemented just that (28 easy-to-read lines of R).

However, it's hard to do something more abstract, e.g. with(data, property) will try to get a property named "property". To circumvent this, one can make a call to eval:

withExpr <- jPaste("with(x,",property,")")
eval(parse(text=withExpr))


I am not happy with this, but there is NO OTHER WAY. I say this confidently because 'with' appears to completely discard the value of the variable passed, while only using its name, i.e. something like:

property <- deparse(substitute(property))

Having to call eval is the price we pay for the convenience of not using quotes.

And, guess what, I take the deal! Yesterday, I wrote 'violinPlot', which is like a 'boxplot' but with kernel density estimates instead of quantiles. The two basic arguments to violinPlot are 'datasets' and 'property': for each dataset, it extracts the property and plots a violin.

l <- list(mon, tue, wed, thu, fri, sat, sun)
violinPlot(l, ZQ/Total.Z, col=c(rep("#AAAAFF",5), rep("orange", 2)), horizontal=FALSE)


My code starts with:
violinPlot <- function(datasets, property,
                       labels=c("M", "T", "W", "R", "F", "Sa", "Su"),
                       horizontal=TRUE, colors=NA){
  property <- deparse(substitute(property))
  colors <- rep(colors, length(datasets)/length(colors)+1)
  densities <- lapply(datasets, function(x) density(with2(x,property)))
  ...
}

with2 <- function(data, expr, ...)
  with(data, eval(parse(text=expr)), ...)


You can see above that I also wanted to pass 'property' without quotes. Having essentially reimplemented 'with', I am in a position to modify it so that the syntax becomes with(data, "ZQ/Total.Z"), and spare myself the eval next time... but I don't wanna.

But here's what I might do: instead of with(data,expr), make it with(data, exprLiteral=NULL, exprToEvaluate=NULL), and you would only pass one of these expr arguments. The difference is that 'exprToEvaluate' gets evaluated into a string (so it better be a string!); whereas 'exprLiteral' gets turned into a string directly, and corresponds to the current syntax of 'with'... and since 'exprLiteral' comes first (in the second position of the argument list), current calls to 'with' would continue working. Yay, backward-compatibility!


More pretty graphics:Read more... )

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“rape is ‘not about sex’” in the same way that “anorexia is ‘not about food.’” [19 Apr 2012|04:04pm]
On the occasion of Take Back the Night, I have been seeing posters claiming that "rape is a hate crime, and not about sexual desire". I was naturally reminded of Maymay's blog post, which attributes this belief to the idea that sex and violence cannot go together (which is obviously contradicted in BDSM).

One might imagine that such a bold conclusion was surely arrived at after years of rigorous studies in behavioral science. And if so, it would be a remarkable finding: considering that animals rape, one should conclude that either humans are special, or that animals also rape for the sake of power alone (both of which seem unlikely to me).

What is so objectionable about the idea that rape is about both sex and power; and why do we need to accompany this with a disclaimer, that rape is an awful thing to inflict on anyone, regardless of the perpetrator's motivations?

Finally, a quote from Staci Newmahr "Playing on the Edge: Sadomasochism, Risk, and Intimacy":
<< Rape, which many of us would shudder to consider “intimacy,” is so heinous precisely because it is so intimate. >>


See also: Rebecca Crane's post about the myth that all rape is committed by men
<< [this myth] encourages many young cisgender men (and others) to internalize the belief that having a penis makes them a rapist NO MATTER WHAT they do -- thus, they might as well just give up (either on sexual relationships entirely or on consent) and not even try. >>


It sounds odd that guilt can propagate this way, but I know a therapist who works here at Columbia, and he told me the exact same thing.

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discovery about my sleep [05 Apr 2012|06:09pm]
I just made a big discovery from my sleep dataset (93 nights): my "Time in REM sleep" has a strong autocorrelation, i.e. I have streaks of high REM sleep nights, and low REM sleep nights.

Here are some statistics, 1-day auto-correlations for different quantities:
 rho-hatCIp-value
Total Sleep time [-0.213, 0.197] 
ZQ0.22[0.0114, 0.4028]3.8e-02
Time in Deep0.29[0.0915, 0.4678]4.9e-03
Time in REM0.43[0.247, 0.584]1.87e-05
Time in Light [-0.243, 0.166] 

The data also suggests that 'Time in Deep' has a significant autocorrelation, but not as strong as 'Time in REM'.

Here's a time series of 'Time in REM':



In the above plot, we see that I had a streak of 6 days in my top quartile, and a streak of 7 days in my bottom quartile... which would be unlikely without autocorrelation.

For comparison, see a series of 'Total sleep' (the really bad nights correspond to a nasty strep infection I had earlier this year):






The natural scientific question is: what factors predict (or better, cause) periods of high REM sleep?  I've computed a tiredness variable, as an exponential moving average of 'Total Sleep Time' (or 'ZQ'), and it suggests that the more tired I am, the less REM sleep I will have... but this effect is estimated at 0.216, which is more modest than the autocorrelation in REM Sleep, so it could be due to confounding (i.e. I am most tired when my previous night's REM Sleep was low, which predicts the next night's REM Sleep also being low).

Note that ZQ is defined as a linear combination of the different phases of sleep, so it's not all that surprising that it seems to have some degree of autocorrelation.  If Z=X+Y, can we decompose autocorrelation(Z) into components?


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what I love about R [04 Apr 2012|11:36pm]
One thing I really love about R is how I can write improperly-scoped code, and everything still works.

gSmooth <- function(x,y, kernelSd=1, kernel=function(z) dnorm(z,mean=x[i],sd=kernelSd)){
  v <- c()
  for (i in seq_len(length(x))){
    weights <- sapply(x, kernel)
    v[i] <- sum(weights*y)/sum(weights)
  }
  list(x=x,y=v)
}

plot(data$ZQ, type="l", ylim=c(0,130))
ss <- gSmooth(1:n,data$ZQ)
pplot(ss$x, ss$y, type="l", col="red")
ss <- gSmooth(1:n,data$ZQ, kernelSd=3)
pplot(ss$x, ss$y, type="l", col="blue")




----

This is much cleaner:
gSmooth <- function(x,y, kernel=gaussKernel){
  v <- c()
  for (i in seq_len(length(x))){
    center <- x[i]
    weights <- sapply(x, function(z) kernel(z, center))
    v[i] <- sum(weights*y)/sum(weights)
  }
  list(x=x,y=v)
}

gaussKernel <- function(z, center) dnorm(z, mean=center, sd=kernelSd)
emaKernel <- function(z, center) if(z<=center) return(exp((z-center)/kernelSd))
                                   else return(0) ## Exponential Moving Average

plot(data$dayNumber, data$ZQ, type="p")
pplot(data$dayNumber, data$ZQ, type="l")


kernelSd <- 3
ss <- gSmooth(data$dayNumber,data$ZQ)
pplot(ss$x,ss$y, type="l", col="red")

kernelSd <- 3
ss <- gSmooth(data$dayNumber,data$ZQ, kernel=emaKernel)
pplot(ss$x,ss$y, type="l", col="blue")



Note how the Exponential Moving Average (in blue) is backward-looking, and less smooth than the Gaussian one (in red), even though these kernels, when viewed as distributions, have the same standard deviation of 3.

I think that this is in part due to the Exponential kernel not being as smooth as the Gaussian one, but I also suspect that it weights the points less evenly.

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equivariant and invariant estimators [26 Mar 2012|10:37pm]
When estimating the parameter of a location family, one can take the sample mean or the sample median. Or, more generally, any equivariant estimator. In a normal location family, the sample mean is efficient. In a double-exponential family, the median is better. (Solve for the MLE in each case. Whenever the MLE exists, it is asymptotically efficient)

Now, note that these two families are disjoint subsets of the exponential power family. When p=1, you're in a double-exponential family (Laplace); when p=2 you're in a normal family.

Michael Sherman - Comparing the Sample Mean and the Sample Median: An Exploration in the Exponential Power Family shows that when p=1.407, the mean and the median are equally good.

Note that the mean and median are examples of linear combinations of the order statistics. We can imagine how different linear combinations of the order statistics would be optimal for different values of p.

---

This is what I saw in class:

Definition: an equivariant estimator T(X) is one that satisfies T(X + ε 1) = T(X) + ε. i.e. if you shift all the data by some amount ε, the estimator changes by ε. Examples: sample mean, sample median, sample max, sample min.

Definition: an invariant estimator T(X) is one that satisfies T(X + ε 1) = T(X). i.e. if you shift all the data by the same amount, the estimator does not change. Examples: sample variance, interquartile range.

Theorem: if T1 is equivariant and T2 is invariant, then T1 + T2 is equivariant.

Definition: the maximum invariant Y(X) is the (n-1)-dimensional vector (X2 - X1, X3 - X1, ..., Xn - X1).

Theorem: every invariant estimator is a function of the maximum invariant.

---

This is how I made sense of it all.

Claim 1: Equivariant estimators are precisely the linear combinations of the order statistics a i X (i) satisfying a 1 +...+ a n =1 .
Claim 2: Invariant estimators are precisely the linear combinations of the order statistics satisfying a 1 +...+ a n =0 .
Proof:
Since the X i are iid, the order statistics X (i) are sufficient.
Non-linear functions of the order statistics cannot be equivariant or invariant. (not proven)
Thus equivariant and invariant statistics must have the form T(X)= a i X (i) .
Now consider that for invariant estimators, T( X+ ε 1 )=T(X)+ ε .
But T( X+ ε 1 )= a i (X (i) + ε )= a i X (i) + a i ε =T(X)+ ε a i .
For equivariant estimator, this must be equal to T(X)+ ε , so it follows that a i =1 .
For invariant estimators, this must be equal to T(X) , so it follows that a i =0.
QED.
---

For the record, I am beginning to use LyX. It is nice, but when I adjust the displayed font size, the math stays the same size, and so it looks comparatively tiny. This post was made by exporting to XHTML, copy-pasting onto DreamWidth, and then deleting the silly "magicparlabel" A-tags that were making everything look green. mirror of this post
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HVAC stupidity [01 Feb 2012|03:28pm]
I've never understood why most buildings have such stupid and clunky HVAC systems, wasting energy while sacrificing your comfort.

Just got an email from the Vice President of Operations, Columbia University Facilities:
Dear Colleagues,
Unseasonably high temperatures are forecasted for our area over the next few days. As we are in the midst of heating season, and most university buildings are not able to supply both heating and cooling simultaneously, many areas of campus may feel warmer than usual. We appreciate your patience as we work to keep everyone on campus comfortable.



"most university buildings are not able to supply both heating and cooling simultaneously"

The implicit premise here is that they can't turn off the heat! It's unclear whether the blame lies with the engineers or the policy-makers.

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Probability II [18 Jan 2012|11:25am]
The first class went pretty well, though I had prepared well by reading up on Karatzas & Shreve during the holidays. This stuff is pretty neat: we defined Stochastic Processes on arbitrary state-spaces and index sets. "Time" can be defined in ℝn, and even in L2! We defined Brownian Motion, and looked at sample paths as functions of time: for any fixed ω, the corresponding sample path is t ↦ Xt(ω).

We showed the existence of Brownian Motion by the Daniell-Kolmogorov Extension Theorem, which can be proven using the Carathéodory Extension Theorem (whatever that means).

We also defined notions of equality of stochastic processes. For simple random variables, the usual notions are:

* absolute equality (my coinage): for all ω . X(ω)=Y(ω)
* almost-sure equality: the set {ω | X(ω)=Y(ω)} has measure 1, also written P(X=Y) = 1.
* equality in distribution: for all A, P(X ∈ A) = P(Y ∈ A)


Now, stochastic processes have a time index.

The notion of absolute equality can be developed very easily:
* X and Y are "absolutely equal" (again, my coinage) if ∀ ω, t . Xt(ω) = Yt(ω)

But, in the case of continuous-time stochastic processes, the notion of almost-sure equality breaks into two non-equivalent notions, which differ on the placement of the quantifier ∀:

* X and Y are said to be indistinguishable if almost all the sample paths agree, i.e. if P({ω | ∀ t ∈ T . Xt(ω) = Yt(ω)}) = 1,

* X and Y are said to be modifications of each other if at every time, they are equal almost surely, i.e. ∀ t ∈ T, P({ω | Xt(ω) = Yt(ω)}) = 1,

Equality in distribution develops into:
* if X and Y have the same finite-dimensional distributions (FDDs), they are said to be versions of each other.

(I suspect there is compactness-type result somewhere, to the effect that having the same FDDs implies having the same infinite-dimensional distributions too)

---

Someone said the style of the lecture was very "French", in the sense that he only gave us a bunch of ideas, little detail, no proofs. I'm totally ok with that, since proofs are best done at the privacy of your own home. The issue, of course, is making sure that one's derivation skills don't fall hopelessly behind. Hopefully the TA will put us through exercises.

The mathematical level seems to be uncomfortably high for most statisticians. A few people were lost when he defined consistency in terms of a "pushforward" (myself included).

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spam in 2012 [17 Jan 2012|10:08pm]
I was just asking someone to not publish my email address inside a plain mailto link, lest spammers harvest my email. I asked that he use instead (a) ReCaptcha (b) an image (c) a JavaScript trick, or (d) a less important email address. He didn't want to bother, so I argued that this is an important email address for me, so that I want to keep the signal-to-noise ratio high; and that once spammers have your address, there's no going back.

Spam filtering is not perfect, and I occasionally see false negatives my Inbox, and false positives in my Spam folder (when I feel brave enough to look through the junk). I always thought that the problem of spam would get worse and worse, given the economic incentives involved, but this doesn't seem to have happened: probabilistic spam filtering does indeed seem to have had a lasting impact; and I'm sure that we also have people who fight this battle at a higher level, occasionally blocking sections of the Internet that send a lot of spam.

My email experience has been quite reasonable in recent years, but I'm not sure how much of this is due to my own hygiene, and how much is due to good spam filtering.

Am I still justified in asking people to not expose my email in mailto links?

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Zeo sleep manager [29 Dec 2011|04:21pm]
(cross-posted from G+)

So I started using a Zeo Sleep Manager last week. It seems to work really well, and I was able to make some pretty graphs with it... BUT:
* it allows naps to be overwritten if you don't upload the data rightaway
* it's hard to export your data without uploading it to MyZeo. The ZeoDecoderViewer app isn't able to read my DAT file. Maybe I should try the Zeo Raw Data Library.

My impression is that they cared about open data geeks up until early 2011, but now they are a mainstream product...

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liquid "r" in the Zona Sur of La Paz, and the reach of American influence [18 Dec 2011|06:35pm]
Yesterday, my girlfriend showed me this video: Boliviano Fashions featuring two Bolivian male characters in their early 20s, with a boastful upper-class attitude: one from La Paz, one from Santa Cruz; making slightly exaggerated accents. The La Paz one (known as a "jailón"; or a guido if we presume he's a wannabe) has a liquid R, roughly ɻ, for "rr" or initial R (i.e. like the stereotypical American "r"):

"perro" = "peɻo", "ratón" = "ɻaton".

... which I hypothesized came from Indigenous languages (which I believe is the origin of the liquid R in Brazil's caipira dialect), but according to my girlfriend this R came from the Americans! Apparently, the American influence on the upper classes of La Paz is much bigger than I imagined.

The fact that many kids who go to the American School of La Paz would speak to each other in English during their off-time and celebrate Thanksgiving makes this theory more plausible. This, of course, makes them the target of other young people, especially those with anti-American sentiment, who see this behavior as pretentious.

In Amsterdam I had a housemate from Colombia who was struggling because he hadn't learned English yet; because when he was younger, he didn't like the idea of being "one of those English speakers", because of its symbolic value. I think this is a pretty common mistake that teens make in Latin America.

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public service announcement - Oxy and sun damage [17 Dec 2011|03:39am]
Over the last two years, my face has become rather freckly, more than anyone in my family. My first dramatic realization of this was during August 2010. I suspect this is due to many years of using anti-acne product Oxy (46% alcohol + 2% salicylic acid) making my skin prone to sun damage. My little patches of red hair during the last few summers are probably due to a similar mechanism.

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20110423060926AAYE7zG
<< You're right that exposing skin treated by salicylic acid to the sun will absolutely increase the likelihood of sun damage to your skin and a sunscreen should be used. I would imagine that the specific SPF you need will depend on things like the amount of sun exposure you'll be getting but here's one resource I like that helps consumers find sunscreens that really protect their skin rather than damage it: the Environmental Working Group's Sunscreen Guide at http://www.ewg.org/2010sunscreen/. >>


The instructions should probably tell you to wash your face with water after use (they don't!). Now I'm trying to use Oxy less often... and sunscreen more often (during the summer).

from the FDA website:
<< according to CIR Director Alan Andersen, products containing salicylic acid should either contain a sunscreen or bear directions advising consumers to use other sun protection. In order to comply with the CIR recommendations, cosmetic manufacturers should test their products to determine whether or not they cause an increase in sensitivity to the harmful ultraviolet radiation in sunlight. >>


... apparently this is not a regulation yet, or not one that is enforced.


http://truthinaging.com/ingredients/salicylic-acid
<< Salicylic Acid is also known to increase the skin’s sun sensitivity by 50%. All exfoliants that remove layers of the dermis expose the skin to more UV rays, therefore increasing UV radiation. >>


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passport validity for entering France; bureaucratic confusopoly [14 Nov 2011|02:53pm]
My passport is expiring at the end of January, and a few weeks ago I made an appointment for tomorrow to renew it, but I figured there was nothing to be worried about, since I have plenty of time. Now, I'm going to Paris for a week on Friday, and since my passport is from Brazil, so I'm not required to get a visa.

However, yesterday my Parisian host told me that in order to enter France, your passport needs to be valid for several months beyond your visit. And in fact, this is not exclusive to France, but exists in most countries: When your valid passport isn't really valid

We did at least an hour of Internet research each... and the sources contradict each other. Below is a summary of our findings, between webpages and other sources:

Some say 6 months: MascaroTour (according to M)

Some say 3 months: here, TIMATIC, French Embassy in Brasília (according to R), French Consulate in Miami (according to V).

Some simply say that the passport just needs to be valid for the duration of your stay here, here (but maybe this is only for UK citizens)

The authoritative source, the French Consulate of New York, mentions no such rule, neither here nor here nor here.

---

Now, the Six Month Club seems to be a multi-lateral agreement to exempt citizens of these countries when visiting other countries in the list. Brazil and France are both on this list of 103 countries.

<< Citizens of the countries listed below are exempt the six-month rule and need only have a passport valid for their intended period of stay. >>


... but maybe this list is only valid for the USA, even though the motivation for the list is universal. Google doesn't know the answer.

For the sake of expediency, as well as science, I would love to see a big table showing entry requirements for every pair of countries (country of citizenship vs country of arrival). I'm not saying it's easy... but seriously, what century are we living in? UPDATE: TIMATIC seems to be such a database.

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e-reader + drawing tablet [29 Oct 2011|01:05pm]
I'm interested in getting:
* an e-reader for reading PDFs on the road (annotation tools would be a plus)
* a drawing tablet, that will let me make xkcd-style drawings with a pen.

Should I get an iPad+iAnnotate? The iPad's touchscreen seems to be very imprecise

P.S.: the BoogieBoard that saves will be shipping next week> It's very affordable at $130, but it's lacking an eraser tool, and I worry that they might use a proprietary file format, rather than PNG and PDF.

---

UPDATE: a high-end solution for drawing is the Cintiq. Their smallest tablet goes for $1000 and it needs to be plugged in to a computer, so not very portable at all.

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RIP John McCarthy [24 Oct 2011|07:47pm]
John McCarthy, one of the pioneers of AI, passed away this morning.

I met him once, back in 2005. It was a day that turned out to put me back on the academic path, if only very indirectly.

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"A First Look at Rigorous Probability Theory"; why I dislike Analysis [20 Oct 2011|01:06am]
I highly recommend "A First Look at Rigorous Probability Theory" by Jeffrey Rosenthal.

This book is an introduction to probability with measure theory. The writing is very clear. When it comes to formality, the book carefully explains notational changes. It's also very good about providing intuitive imagery, while reinforcing the mathematical results with plenty of examples and counterexamples. I've never had a single book answer so many of my pre-existing questions during a casual 30-minute read.

Thanks to Jon Fintzi for the recommendation.

---

I have a rant about formal Probability, and Analysis in general, being deeply frustrating subjects. For example, if you use a more advanced result to prove a more basic one, you're "cheating". I suppose that's how foundational subjects are supposed to go, and "mathematical maturity" consists in inhibiting your intuitions; whereas my natural tendency is a coherentist one and has lots of room for "reckless" intuitions*. Symbol-crunching is best left to my computers, except when it can teach me something useful. I suppose this kind of mental weight-lifting is good exercise, though.



* - falsities will eventually lead to contradictions, as long as you do frequent tests; this is analogous to the way we find bugs in software. Some mathematicians feel superior about their epistemic modality, because proofs are infallible, don't you know?? I say, more power to them! But just as mathematicians are unsatisfied with results that have only been verified empirically, I am likewise distrustful of proofs that haven't been formalized and checked by computers.

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LJ password rules [17 Oct 2011|01:42am]
Dear LiveJournal staff, your password rules are very silly.

You should read this: http://xkcd.com/936/

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